Hello it’s a pleasure to meet you. My name is Dr. Legem Eliquatus Beerus Pinga, but you can call me by my nickname, Dr. Drinkbuster. I`ve heard you are a drinker so I'm here to help. Today`s lesson is “Hangovers 101”.
A typical day after a party:
Let's start this small class by talking about yesterday's night out. It was fun, wasn't it? Well...now you are stuck in bed wishing you didn't
have to work and if that wasn't enough, you still think that the 14th shot of vodka really was the one who made you feel this way. Silly, silly child... But fear not my pupil you just have to throw up and everything will be all right, right?
This is only one of a series of myths you and your fellow young drinkers keep believing. As with most things in life, nothing in excess comes without consequences. So, if you are feeling dizzy in the morning, know that trying to sleep it off or some sort of other weird ancient Polynesian ritual is not going to save you.
You are what you eat:
A weird category of hangover recipes is related to food items, so let’s break them down first.
Eating Bread, although very delicious in the morning, won't make you more sober, neither will drinking gallons and gallons of water. Alcohol is a substance that ends up in your blood system after consumption. So, unless you are open to a blood transfusion with a croissant, doubt you will feel better with one as your hangover solution.
In the same vein, having a special drink when you wake up, like a Bloody Mary will only add insult to injury, so no no no to that too.
I'm not an actual doctor you know:
“But Dr, can I use some pain-relieving medication to win my fight against this monster of the hangover?” - said the hypothetical stupid student sitting in front of me in the imaginary class room.
NO! Drinking and using medication is and always has been especially dangerous, and if you, hypothetical student that I just invented, was in front of me now I would have insulted your outfit. Hahaha I am a funny Dr.
The class is over:
I would love to keep rambling, I mean teaching you all more, but I have a drink to attend to. So, I will tell you the truth.
When waking up after a fantastic party have a nice breakfast, your body needs sugar, vitamins and minerals. After that get yourself together and go for a walk, it may seem hard but your best and most realist solution is just too sweat it all out of your system, and drink some water too.